Miraculous Moment #5 - Chapter 3 of - "If An Angel Didn't Perform a Miracle for Toby" - "Who Did"

Hello Again -

Please Note That -

These 4 Chapter - Note "FOUR CHAPTER" - Spiritual-based postings -

Are Based on -

Our Rescued DOG - TOBY'S - "Squirrelly Documentary"

As Well As - His -

"Angelic" -

"SPIRITUAL EXPERIENCE"

Which had resulted in Our Final -

"Who Did It?"

Question

????

And That This Posting is - Part 3... of Those 4 Chapters

It was - Shortly Before Toby's 15th Birthday -

That The Following Scenario - "Unfolded"

!!!!!!!!!!!

During the Very Moment - in Which He'd - "Just Now" -

"ONCE AGAIN" -

Finished Chasing Frederick the 3rd...

All the Way Over - to that Very Same Stone Wall...

Upon the Very “Millisecond”... That I'd Opened the Side-Porch Door...

On that particular "Monday" morning... & at 7:30am to Be Exact

Following Which - I’d Habitually Called out... -

In the "Exact Same Way" as I've Always Done...

Following Every Other - Ritual-based - "Chipmunk-chasing" Event...

& While Toby - “Once Again” -

Frustratingly (& I Do Mean - &^%$#@! Frustratingly) Just "Stood There" -

On Just His Hind Legs... Stretching Upward - While -

Pressing His Front Paws up Against... the Rather “SHORT” Retaining Wall...

Which - He's "Obviously"... "Unable” to Jump up Onto...

Although it's "ONLY" a Few Stones High...

& Which - I Must Say - is a Height-Topic Which "REALLY IRKED" Toby -

Since all of Fred's Relatives Have WAY Shorter Legs Than He Does - & Yet All of Fred's -*!@&^%$#@!& Chipmunk's Kinfolk -

Can - STILL - SOMEHOW - & Oh “So Easily” - Get up There

"Come on Back Here Toby... Fred "Won Again"...

Because You Know - That You Can't Go Any Further...

As You're Too Short - to Jump Up There!"

Toby - Somewhat Reluctantly...

Turned Himself Around... From Where the "X" is Located in the Photo Above

So That He's Now - Facing the Porch Steps...

& Basically Just as - He Would've "Always Done"... on Every Other... Past-occasion

!!!!!!!!!

Where He Then Began to “Proudly Trot” on Back...

Towards Where I'm Standing; here on the porch...

With His - Head Held Upward - Those Determined-Eyes Focusing Straight Ahead -

The - Front-end (Short) Heize-Canine Shoulders “Solid & Firm” -

& of Course - With His “Bushy-Tail-Flag” - Wavering "Straight-upward" -

Basically - Like as if -

He Was "Smirkingly" Saying to Himself - as Well as "Subliminally" to Fred "of Course" -

& Just Like He’d "Always" Be Doing - During Each "Strutting" - Stone-wall Departures

"You Just Wait Fred... Because "Next time" - I'll Get You...

Yup... Yes Sir - Next time Fred...

I'm Going to "Win" This "Bushy-tailed" &^%$#@! Rat Race!"

But Then...

Suddenly - When He Was Only About 4 Steps Into His “Glorified-trot” -

& Heading Back Towards Where I'm Waiting for him - Here on the Porch -

He "Abruptly Stopped" -

& Just - "Stood There" - on the Lawn!!!!

Like as If - “Something” - was Literally “Forcing Him” to Become -

"FROZEN-STILL"

During His Regular -

Proudly Prancing Although Perhaps Perturbed - "Return-track" Ritual

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

& of Course - As Toby Was Definitely - a Dog of Habit & Ritualistic Sports-Behaviour;

In the Same Was as - Nut-grabbing Fred - Obviously Was

I Quickly Began Running Towards The Front Lawn -

Hollering -

"TOBY - ARE YOU OK"

As He Began DESPERATELY GASPING for AIR!

Before Collapsing Forward - Into the Soft Grass!

Quickly Cradling our 4-Legged Friend - Into My Arms -

While Searching for - a

“Visual-Answer” -

Via our Senior Friends - “Expressive-Eyes” -

& Simply Because - We’ve Continuously - Over the Years -

Made “Direct Eye-contact” With Each Other -

Whenever We’re Having a - "Serious-Based" - “Canine to Human” Conversation -

& Especially During One of - Our "Bonding" & "Emotional-based" Discussions -

Like For Example - Back When - I'd Explained the “Adulthood & Childhood”

Bed Size Differences to Him; and which I'd shared with you earlier

Immediately Upon Receiving Toby’s “Visually-Spoken-words” -

My Panic & Anxiety Level - Rapidly Intensified

!!!!!!!!!

As it Was - Quite Obvious -

That Our Senior-Friend - Was Currently Experiencing -

BOTH - EXTREME - "PAIN & FEAR"... "TOGETHER" -

Due to His Inability to Get Any Oxygen, Into His Lungs -

& Which - Was Rapidly Causing His Eyes - To Begin to Lose -

Their “Visual-verbal-Contact” with Mine

As My Husband - Had Right Then - Stepped Into Our Visual Field -

(Since he was about to get into his car... & leave for work)

With Him “Still” Driving - But “No Longer” to a Job-site -

& While I Continued to Cradle & Comfort Toby in the Passenger-seat…

We Quickly Headed up the Road - to the - Emergency Veterinary Clinic -

Hoping that - They’d Be Able to Tell us -

What’s Actually Happening... With our “Senior Friend” this Morning?

& While ALSO - of Course... the Whole Way There - Silently-praying - That They'd “SOMEHOW” - BE ABLE - to - Quickly Reassure us -

That - Toby Will Soon - Be "Once Again" Resuming… His "Fred-chasing" Rituals…

Unfortunately though… After Completing –

The Emergency X-ray... of Toby's Chest...

We Were Called... Into One of the Private Examination Rooms with Him

!!!!!!!

Where They Showed us... up on the X-ray Display-Screen... How -

Toby's Lungs Were Slowly Filling with Liquid...

Since His heart was Quite Inflamed & Currently Unable to Pump Fast Enough -

To Keep the Liquid Out of Them

!!!!!!!!!

They Then - Began to Explain - How & Why -

"No Optional" Cures... Would be Possible... For Our Friend...

Due to His Age... as He Was Currently 3 Years Past His Prime

Which Meant that -

His Inflamed (Swollen) Heart Wouldn't be Able to Make it Through Surgery;

As It Would Stop Working - The Very Moment -

That He Was Being Heavily-Sedated for ANY TYPE of Operation!

My Husband & I - Had To Suddenly "Face the Fact" -

That - One of Our Dearly Loved - 4-Legged Family Members -

Would "Quite Soon" Now... No longer Be With Us...

No Matter What We Chose to Do - at That Moment

And so - ......!!!!! - ????

I'm Sorry But...

I Simply Don't Know... How to Put Into Words - What I'm Trying to Say... Right Now...

As What... I am Currently Feeling, and Thinking…

As I Share This Part of that Unfolding-Moment With You -

Is Obviously Something - that Basically Cannot...

Be Put Into Written-words; or Even Explained Verbally!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Other than the Fact...

That that Monday Morning... Had Suddenly... Become - the Most Dreaded-moment...

That Eventually Happens... in Every Pet Owners Life.

& of Which - None of Us, Ever Want, to Have to Either Face... or Deal With...

Although We All Know... That This Dreaded Day... is Unfortunately an -

"Inevitable One"

However - My Husband & I - Have Also... Always Believed... That the Saying -

"It is - Better to Have - Loved & Lost -

Than - To Have Never, Loved At All"

Is Not Only - VERY TRUE... But is "Also Applicable" to - "MANY FORMS" of - "Life"

As That Phrase - Obviously Applies... To "Not Just" our "Family Members"...

As Well as Many Other - "Mortal Friends",

But Rather - that Phrase Also... Applies to - our "Pets" As Well

##########

As Our Pets

Like "Who", and "What", Toby was, in Our Family)

Are Quite Often - One of -

"OUR BEST FRIENDS”

& Even - One of Our “Most Cherished Companions"

Which is Why... that Particular Morning... had Quickly Become - the -

"Long-Dreaded Inevitable Scenario-Moment - in Which"...

We Suddenly Had - No Choice - But to Inform the Vet.

In Response to What They'd Just Explained to Us...

That -

"If That is The Case - Then -

We Need to Know If - You'd Be Able to Give Toby That -

"Special - Once in a Lifetime - Deep-Sleep Injection - A.S.A.P."

So that He - "No Longer" - Has to Suffer - or be in Any Pain"

And - We Want to Be Here With Him...

When You Give Him That - "Special-shot"

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

& of Course - Shortly Following That Request -

The Lumps in Our Throats - Had Rapidly Become Inflamed & Painful -

While Our Vision Quickly Become Blurred by the Pools of Salty-liquid -

& both of which we "Obviously" Didn't Want - Our Friend Toby to Notice -

Since We'd told Him - That He Was "Simply" -

Going to Be Getting a "Comforting Shot" - That Would Help Him Feel Better -

Really Soon Now...

As We Stood There - Gently Stroking & Snuggling Him -While Letting Our Friend Know

How Much We Loved Him...

And How Important He Was to Us...

During - What We Both Knew - Would Soon Become - Our "Last Opportunity" to do so

& Then -

While Toby Slowly Began Fading into, the Really Deep “Medicinal Sedated-sleep” ...

On that Monday morning... at 8:15am.

That We Knew Would - Soon Now - Within Less Than a Minute - Be Taking Him Over to

The “Next Dimension”

A Gradual - “Saddened-Relief” -

of Knowing - That Really Soon - our Dear Friend -

Would - "No Longer" - be "Suffering"

In Either - the Pain - or the Fear - of Not Being Able to Breath

Came -

"OVER US"

At That Very “Same Moment” -

That a - "Sudden-Voidness" - Slowly Began Dwelling -

"WITHIN US"

Due to the Fact - That -

Our Friend's Last Breath - Was the Exact Moment In Which -

Toby Had -

Not Only - "Begun to Depart” ... From THIS Dimension...

& During Which Moment - We'd Each Felt - Not Just -

Toby's Love for Us & Ours for Him...

But We’d Also Felt - During The Exact Moment in Which -

He’d Released His Last Deep Breath -

That He'd "ALSO" - at That "VERY SAME MOMENT" -

Taken... a Part of Us... With Him... on His -

"New Journey"

Following that Last-shot - & With a "Special-part" of us - Now Missing...

We "SILENTLY"... Drove Back to The House

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

As There was - “Obviously No Need” - for Either One of Us “To Speak” Right Now...

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And besides... It's Always Difficult to Speak... The Very First Time...

That You Get Into Your Vehicle...

Without - "All" - of Your "Regular Passengers"... With You...

Making it - One of the Most Difficult - "Emotional-drives" - That You'll Ever Take.

When We Arrived Back Home -

Our Other 3... Senior dogs... 15-year-old "Dudley" and his Sibling "Tiny"...

And Their Mother Malibu (The White Poodle)

Were Patiently Waiting for us... Just as They Always Would've Been

& We Could Tell... Right Away...

The Moment that The 5 of us - Exchanged "Visual-words" -

Upon Us Making Direct Eye Contact with Each Other.

That They (Malibu - Dudley & Tiny) Were Each - Fully Aware... of the Fact...

That Our Home Was Now ""Missing"...

An "Emotionally-Treasured Part" of it.

& That They’re Obviously - Also in Mourning... for Our Currently Departed Friend.

As Old Dud's Began - Tipping his Head... While Giving us That -

"Toby's Gone... Isn't He" -

Eyeing-Look

Shortly After my Husband had Left...

And Malibu & Her 2 Kids (Dudley and Tiny) were all - “Senior-napping” ...

Which is what - They'd Recently, Begun Spending “Most” of Theirs Days Doing...

I Opened the Side-Porch Door...

Just as I’d Done Earlier on This Morning…

& Quickly Noticed... How “Even” Frederick or Fredrika the Third... (Whichever)

Knew...

That This Morning...

Had Suddenly Become - "The Day" in Which -

They'd No Longer Be Able - to Play... the Traditional “Routine-sport” with Toby

Which Explain why -

Fredrika & Frederick the 3rd Never Again...

From that Moment Onward...

Ran... Quickly Down those Porch Steps...

Whenever the Door was Opened.

But Rather - They'd Now... Just Sit There... on the stone edge…

While Giving me That -

"Hey Lady - I'm Still Waiting Here for Those Nuts!"

Starved (Tongue Hanging Out) Look - on Their Face

During the “Next SIX” days -

From that Monday Morning - Right up to “8am on the Upcoming Sunday” -

I was Extremely Glad... that I Had - All of my Regular, Home-errands & Chores -

To Tend to -

From the Flowerbeds Outside... to the Regular Daily Choirs Inside...

As All of These Variable, and Ongoing Activities, Had Meant that...

I'd "Somewhat" Be Able - to Remain Busy Enough...

During "Most" of the day...

So That I Wouldn’t Have Any Time to -

Relive or Dwell on - What Had Occurred on Monday Morning!

Right up to... the Upcoming “Sunday Morning”

And of Course - Both my Husband & I... Were Extremely Glad...

That We “Still Had” ... our Other 3 Dogs... Malibu, Dudley and Tiny...

(As well as... Each Other... of Course)

& That our House was Therefore "Not" Completely Pet (or Person) Empty…

Following Our Loss

BUT THEN...

As those six days... Had Eventually Gone By...

(From the Monday morning, when we had lost Toby... right up to Saturday evening)

"SUNDAY MORNING"

Was Suddenly Here!

!!!!

And of course....

This Particular Sunday Morning....

Was -

"Extremely Different"

From Any Other Morning... For All of us Residing Here...

(Both the Mortals & Canines)

Because Sunday had (over the years) become the Traditional-day... in this household...

When We Would - "ALL" - Get Into Our Car... at 7:30am -

So That we Could "ALL" Go out - "TOGETHER" for breakfast -

(Now of course, the Dog-residence in our home...

Would Always have to wait... in the car... for their special Sunday “Breakfast-treats” ...

Since My husband and I Weren’t Allowed, to take them Into the Restaurant with us...

However - Our “4-Legged” Kids Knew That - We’d “NEVER” Get Back Into The Car -

Following our Sunday-Breakfast - Empty Handed - Without Breakfast-Tidbits for Them)

& of Course... the Point... that I'm Needing to Make Right Now... is Simply that -

We Would Always..."All"... be doing this “Sunday Morning Outing” - "Together"...

Where "Everybody" who Resided here - at our home address...

Would either, "Get Themselves Into"... or be LIFTED "Up & Into"... our car…

At around 7;30am

And then...

We would "ALL" head out "Together" for breakfast

In other words -

Every Sunday Morning...

"Everybody" who Resided here - at our home address...

Would either, "Get Themselves Into"... or be Lifted "Up & Into"... our car

And then...

We would "ALL" head out "Together" for breakfast

And so... of Course...

It was... as I was placing Tiny & Malibu onto the backseat of the vehicle...

on my passenger side...

While My husband at That Very Same Moment -

Had been placing Dudley... into the backseat on the Driver’s side...

That We Both - “Simultaneously” -

Lifted Our Heads - & Looked Directly Across the Backseat - Towards Each Other...

& Immediately Made - “DIRECT EYE CONTACT” - While Doing so!

!!!!!!!!!

& Hence - at Which Point -

We were -

"Suddenly Exchanging"... that "Heart-ache" - Eyeing-Expression...

That - "Visually Speaks"...

One’s Inward-words - "Clearly Enough"... to the Another Person...

That They Don't Actually Have to be Verbalized!

As We (My husband & I) Could "Visually Hear" - Each Other's Eyes...

Saying -

"THIS IS THE -

"VERY FIRST TIME"...

That -

“WE ARE GOING OUT for BREAKFAST"

"WITHOUT TOBY"

!!!!!

Now of Course... Neither One of Us... "Verbalized"...

What We Were Each... Currently “THINKING” ...

After Making “Direct Verbal-Eye Contact” Across the Back seat of the Car

Simply Because - We Both Knew...

That - if Either One of Us... "Even Just Attempted" - to Verbalize -

Those - "Mutual-Thought-words"...

That Suddenly - We Wouldn't be Able...

To Continue to Keep our "Toby-based Emotions" Suppressed... & Under-control!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And Thereby Still be Able...

To Actually go out for our Traditional "Sunday Morning Breakfast"

Since Toby - Obviously Isn't Going to Be Getting Into This Vehicle - With the Rest of us.

And so we each - Just Quickly & Silently - Broke Eye-contact -

& Closed our Backseat Doors -

& Quietly Got ourselves, Seated In the Front…

With "Only" 3 dogs... This Sunday - in the backseat!

& While Trying to now "Pretend"... That We’re Each Doing “Just Fine”...

Although We're Obviously Missing an Important Piece of "Emotional-Baggage"

BUT THEN -

Just as we Began to Ascend up the Sloped Driveway...

My Husband - Suddenly... Put His Foot on the Brake...

While Staring Over - Towards the Stone Wall... Where Toby had Collapsed on Monday!

While Asking -

"What Is That??"

I Glanced Towards the Area... He Was Focusing on...

And Replied –

"I Don't Know".... "But It Looks Like it Might be - an Envelope"

"& So - Just Park & Wait Here... & I'll go Over and Get It"

?????????????????????

I got out of the car... & Began Walking Over Towards the Stone Wall...

Where the "X" in the photo Above (& Below) is located - & Which is -

(& as You Likely Already Realize)

The - "Exact location -

That Toby Would’ve Chased Fred over to...

During His “Final Chipmunk-chase” ... a week ago; Tomorrow...

as That’ll be Monday morning

And so… of Course... You're Likely Able to Imagine... & Even "Fully Understand" -

WHAT - I was BOTH -

Thinking, & Emotionally Experiencing...

While Getting Closer to - that White Object...

That’s Laying There - on the ground “Right Where Toby Had Last Stood” ...

a Week Ago, “Tomorrow Morning”

And Therefore - You will Likely - Also be Able to - Understand "Why" -

I'd Quickly Found Myself -

Glancing All Around the Visual-circumference -

of Where I'm Currently Approaching -

Before Bending Down - at Toby's Last Location - Here on this Property

To Pick up this White Object!

As I'm Trying to See - Who's Eyes - Were Watching Me - At That Moment -

Because I Strongly-Felt - Like as if - "Someone" or -

"SOMETHING"

"Obviously Was"

?????????

But There Doesn't Appear to Be Anyone Nearby - Watching me -

Other than the those - that're Eyeing me from our car windows

My Husband... as I opened the car door - to Get Back in - Was Quick to Ask -

"What Is It?"

I replied -

"Going by - The Size & Shape - I Think it’s a Card"

I Proceeded to Open the Envelope - & Removed a Sympathy card -

Along With - a Printed-out Piece of Paper That’d Been Folded Twice & Placed into it.

While Explaining -

"It is a sympathy card....

From the Vet Clinic, that We’d Taken Toby to”

"A Week Ago Tomorrow"

"And It’s Signed, by All of the People that Work There "

"And The Folded Paper That is With it - is Basically Telling us -

That Although - Toby is No Longer Physically Here - With us...

That He’s Still - "Spiritually" with us..."Wherever We Go"....

And That - He’ll be Waiting for us - to Join Him...

At Heaven's Gate...

Before He Crosses Over... and Enters Into it"

I Confusingly-eyed in Silence, across the front seat...

While My Husband - Looked-Speechlessly Towards me

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Until I Eventually... Broke Our “Baffled-silence” ...

By My Asking -

"When was the last time, that you went up to the mailbox?"

(* our neighborhood mailboxes, are all located together, at the end of the street)

He Replied -

"I Was Up There on Friday -

But that Letter OBVIOUSLY Wasn’t in it"

I replied -

"Ok - But Then - “How” Did it End up Here...

And - Laying Right Where Toby Had Run To?”

?????????????

"And Besides That -

I Know That I Would’ve Noticed it Just Laying There…

Since I Walk Past That Flower Bed “Every morning” -

And Obviously, this “Bright White” envelope...

Would’ve Stood Out...

During the Week...

Just Like it Did This Morning…

To Either One of Us!”

!!!!!!!!!

“And so - There’s Obviously - “No Way” That -

One of Us - Wouldn’t Have Seen it - Before This Morning…

And so - I'm Just Asking You -

“HOW” do You "THINK" It Got There?”

??????????????????????????????

????????????????

?????

My Husband Replied -

"I Don't Know… I Have No Answer for You"

I Responded -

"Well All I Know... For Sure Right Now…

Is That the Vet's Office will be Closed today...

As They're Not Open on Sundays...

And so I Won't be Able to Find Out Until Tomorrow Morning,

“Who”

Dropped This Letter Off...

& on "THAT SECTION" of the Lawn?

And - Also “Why” - They Left it Laying There - in the First Place…

Rather Than Drop it off At Our Door?”

As I Spoke Those Last few Words –

We Slowly Exited Onto the Main Road, in Front of our Property...

Where we Then - Proceeded to head on out for our Regular "Sunday-breakfast"...

Just like we Always Would've Done... on Every Other "Sunday Morning"

& While - We Each Began to Slowly Feel... Like as if... a Hurtful-burden...

That We’d Each Been Carrying... During These Last Six Days...

Was No Longer - Traveling With Us.

Since We Both... Could Suddenly - Actually Feel... That Toby Was in Fact -

Spiritual-There - With us...

Just As it Had Mentioned in - This "Confirming-letter"...

And so - With the -

"Miraculous Message - About the Presence"

of -

a "Four Legged" -

"Spiritual Passenger"

That's Currently Situated In The Back Seat of Our Car -

Just As the Physical-Toby - Would Have Always Been -

During Every Other Sunday Morning Drive...

The "6" of Us - Now continued Going Out for our Regular -

Sunday Morning Breakfast...

Just as The "6" of us - Have Always Done Before Last Monday

Of course... During the Next, Upcoming 24 hours...

We Had Each Been "Trying" to - "Somehow" - "Logically Evaluate"...

And Thereby Make... Some Form of "Common & Logical Sense"

Concerning What Had Actually Happened - Here on This Property... on This Particular Sunday Morning.

& While of Course... Continuing to Try & Figure Out -

"How"

This Unexplainable-Scenario - Could Have EVER Possibly Occurred... in the

"First Place" 

As We Simply Wanted to Have a -

"Solidified Explanation"

Concerning "How" That Envelope -

Had Ended up in "That Particular Location"

And so - Hence -

Heading Out In Search of that Explanation...

Is Exactly... What I did...

On that Monday morning...

& Which - Had Resulted in My Having...

A "Rather" Interesting "Questioning & Explanatory" Based Conversation...

Between Myself... & the Really "Confused" Receptionist

Which Had Begun Unfolding...

Somewhat Like This -

End of Chapter 3... of 4 ... of Miraculous Moment # 5

Which is Based on - Our Dog Toby's "Squirrelly Documentary"

& of Course -

on

His

"Spiritual Journey"

& Which - Will Be "Concluded" in Chapter # 4

of Miraculous Moment # 5

That's Posted on

whatisthenameofmyblog.com

Signed -

Mary Not Me